peanutbutter handjob

"oh baby i can't wait to have me inside of me. i want you so bad. "

"hmmm"

"maybe we should shag on the phone"

"no save your energy till i come tommo to pound your pussy to groundnut"

A conversation like this should hint towards a forthcoming night of mad steaming sex.

hair to the bone, blindfolds, bed post crumbling, a sea of crumpled bedsheets soaked fluid and various other cliche and non cliche images found in popular and im-popular media online and offline.

In my time, i have had a lot of bad sex. If you eat pizza everyday there's bound to be a few bad slices every now and then. some girls don't talk or make a sound, some don't move too much, some have goody-two-shoes beliefs and others who do it coz it's "cool"

But the one i cajooned with following the above phone conversation deserves a category of her own. when zombies, the living dead and the dead men of dunharrow had a threesome it must've been like this. Dark, gloomy and devoid of any life.

Act 1 Foreplay

Tits to kill, legs to open tiger woods' nine iron, a little black nightdress and makeup in bed. My cock got giddy and my hands were busy. the fire of the phone call channels through her loins with commanding horniness. A short but intense foreplay is usually a good indication of the animal-ness to follow.

Oh yeah. !!!

"fuck me"

Oh yeah !!!

… but apparently her jakyll does hyde. From a cheap amatuer porn video she went to an extra attending the funeral scene on deasperate housewives. Slow, fast, deep, short, lick slip, nick , tuck , pull , spank, twist, press, pressurise, suck, crank it up 5 notches… phew. No sound from the woman. In fact she was lying in the 'attention position' so perfectly that i expected the hail hitler salute anytime. Wait, maybe i should have tried that

"fuck me mein fuhrer"

same continued with blowjobs, titty fuck, handjobs, doggy fuck. The woman showed no emotion. Yet according to her she was having orgasms. My cock can't take it anymore.

how was this woman like this ?

Self esteem issues ? Daddy issues ? Sexual issues ? Or on the contrary she's bdsm or some shit. phew. Well i simply did what any man should have done after such terrible sex. Blew the load on her face and hair. Yeah, i wanna see you get THAT out of your hair in the morning and still make the 9 am meeting on time.

One drawback though, this night has put me off sex. so much that i can't even think about fucking anyone which is so bloody rare for me. Yet it has also made me decide that i have played in numbers for the better part of this decade. Now (at least for the remainder of this year) i am going to play only with girls with whom i have a certain amount of chemistry. Random sex don't cut it no more.